Jakarta Clarity.
Being in Jakarta has started to give me this sense of calm I can’t seem to find in Perth. Even my own house - which is my very own slice of heaven - sometimes leaves me feeling empty. To me, Jakarta is that defogging button that you press to sort out your windshield. Totally gives me clarity.
It’s like swallowing The Little Book Of Calm and somehow having it assimilate into my system, which is, of course, impossible.
I’m taking it easy, taking it slow. Just being.
I’m loving it.
Regarding The Ex.
So, after watching his last video I feel betrayed all over again. Yeah yeah, I know I should stop watching them. But I only started again when I found out he was moving to Korea. Korea’s a long way from South America. I’m sure he said the Lord commanded him to go to South America to save all those lost souls.
I’m confused.
All these weird broken plans makes me wonder whether or not God was really the reason why he broke up with me. I’m thinking it was more because of her. I knew about her all along. Yet I don’t blame her at all because she was me in 2006.
Watch the video.
4:49 is a stab in the heart.
Did you see it? That little pause as he thought of her?
Before her, that little pause was mine.
Sunday Sads. Monday Melancholy.
Sunday evening always has a
Sense of something good about to end, I know
We hold our breaths for tomorrow…
I don’t do well when there aren’t constants in my life. I hate big happy nights because I know that it won’t last. And big happy weekends are even worse because it all disappears come Monday.
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"You are as abandoned and noisy as any character in a porn film, Laura. You are Ian's plaything, responding to his touch with shrieks of orgasmic delight. No woman in the history of the world is having better sex than sex you are having with Ian... in my head."
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